When God Writes Your Life Story

About a month ago, I finished my fifth, and one of the hardest, year of college. It was a very eventful and often stressful year, but a blessed one too. However, throughout the entire year, I got this question numerous times, by numerous people: "Do you graduate soon?" or "Do you graduate in May?" When I came home for the summer, friends who I do not have regular contact with asked "Are you graduated?" And quite honestly, I was getting rather tired of those questions. I wanted to get a shirt that said "When I graduate, you will be the first to know!" I was also asked if I had "a special man in my life" (The answer is no, I don't. And that's okay! Singleness is a gift for me right now)

Often, I am ashamed to admit, I  found myself complaining to my God. "Why am I taking six years to finish my undergraduate years?" "Why am I still working toward my Bachelor's at the age of twenty-three?" "Why am I still single?" I felt like I was "behind" in life, or perhaps taking too long to finish this stage of life, or "get on" with God's plan for my life. Did I make a mistake going to Ivy Tech for two years?

However,  God has slowly but surely been revealing to me this truth: God is a Creator and an Author. He isn't an inventor.

What I mean by this is my God writes unique plans for each of His children. None of them are the same. As I began looking at my Savior as a Creator and creative Writer, I could see His plans for my life a little more clearly. I am beginning to learn not to compare myself to others. For example, this past May many of my highschool friends graduated from college, and when I saw their graduation pictures on facebook, my heart would become a little jealous. But when I ran to Jesus with my jealously (and weariness from all the work in school) He always reminded me that His plans for me are not my plans (or my parents', the world's, et ctetera).  He would then help me to look back on the past five years of college and see how much He has worked in my life, blessed it beyond my imagination, changed my heart, and used me in other people's lives.

When you are open to following God's plan for your life, forsaking your own, He always does amazing things! For me, one of those was helping me develop very special and intimate relationships with my two best friends. One of them was taking one more semester in school (at Ball State) and in that semester, God changed her life completely around! And I was there to witnessed it! Had I finished school in four years, I probably wouldn't have been able to witness it, and she and I most likely wouldn't be the type of friends we are now. (Which is the very best, as close as sisters could be!) I couldn't ask for anything better. God used both of my best friends to really work on my heart, reveal some things to me, deepen my walk with Him, and change my heart. And I am thankful and humbled to say that He has apparently used me in their lives as well. Our friendships are a precious gifts and tremendous blessings I never saw coming. 

One of the greatest lessons God taught me was to not compare myself to others. As the only hard of hearing individual amongst my family and friends, it is often way too easy for me to compare myself to others. I am also in a stage in my life when so many friends are graduating, starting their careers, getting engaged, getting married.  This past year, I often found myself feeling sorry for myself because, as I saw it,  I was "stuck in the same stage of life as I was in highschool" When I compared myself to my graduated friends and even those who were getting married or engaged, I began complaining to my God "Why is it taking so long???" I felt out of place. I felt like a failure, a disappointment, a misfit. But the truth is, I am none of those things. Those are the labels the world gives me. Getting your Bachelor's in four years is the World's definition of "success". But it is by no means God's definition (I wonder if He even defines anything as "successful") God defines me as Redeemed, Precious, Chosen, His Daughter, His servant. Those are my true identities, though it is often easy to forget that when comparing oneself to the world.

It is true, it is taking me six years to finish college. (Two years at Ivy Tech didn't really help with the time, just the money :D )  But that is okay! Apparently, that was God's plan for my life. And I am okay with that! If I had finished college in four years, I wouldn't be friends with so many incredible people in my life. I wouldn't have had two incredible part time jobs at two different ChickfilA's (If I graduated in 2014, I most likely never would have applied at the Muncie ChickfilA) My best friend and I wouldn't have the joy of sharing the friendship we do now. I wouldn't have gotten to spend as much time with my siblings as I have (especially my brother, who is eleven years my junior. I possibly would have missed too many milestones for him and April because of a career). I wouldn't have had the privilege to work with the students I did last year at Indiana School for the Deaf because they would have been a grade younger than second, fifth, sixth and ninth  (which were the grades I worked with). But more importantly, I wouldn't learned to look to my God in my frustration, to trust Him completely with my life, or to abandon my own plans for my life and follow Him. I am beginning to learn to live moment by moment, not in the future. Now, I have made some plans for the next few years in my head (which hopefully includes teaching at ISD or a similar school) but I have also surrendered those plans to my King, knowing that the God who has provided for me in the past, can provide for the future! I am beginning to ask "So what's the plan, Lord?" instead of "Why are my plans failing or taking too long??" It really helps me to focus on my relationship with my King.

Last year, I was in a car wreck that very easily have taken my life or changed it. (God is a beautiful Protector!) And from that wreck, I learned to embrace each day, and LIVE each day for Him! All we are promised is today. Tomorrow isn't promised. While we should be careful to complete all the responsibilities He entrusts us with, I believe He also wants us to find joy and beauty in each day. To take time to Praise Him. To enjoy the relationships He gives us. To look at each day as a gift. I am not good at these things. Especially when I am stressed, worried, or frustrated with life. But, I am learning. I am learning to live like tomorrow isn't promised. To love all the amazing people He placed in my life.

My challenge to you is this: Surrender. Surrender your life to the Giver of Life. He is an amazing God who has such beautiful plans for His children. And He is a Creator. Of course each of our life story is unique! It is written specifically for each of us individually. Make plans, but let God be the one to carry them out. He will never disappoint.